If political parties were businesses, what kind of businesses would they be? Most certainly retail, so they could appeal to the masses of voters. With the parliamentary elections of 2026 drawing closer, this column seeks to examine parties through a commercial perspective, without intending to offend anyone.
The Big Political Chains
If parties were supermarkets, the major chains would be DISY and AKEL. They are spread across Cyprus through grassroots organisations and patriotic associations, offering loyalty schemes for their faithful customers. With diversity on their shelves, DISY once stocked everything from centrist liberals to ultra-nationalists, while AKEL ranged from pro-Stalinists to social democrats. Today, the classification seems to be between the apolitical and the populists, and the serious ones, who are becoming increasingly scarce.
The major problem facing both supermarkets, particularly AKEL, is their failure to secure a prime location in the largest political mall of all: the Presidential Palace. Equally problematic is the need for constant investment to satisfy increasingly demanding voters, while many suppliers feel they were left unpaid when these parties were in government. The question is whether voters and suppliers alike will extend them credit again in 2026.
The Centre’s Cooperative
The cooperative model is followed by the Centre parties, DIKO, EDEK and DIPA, which resemble small to medium-sized neighbourhood grocery stores. They stock a bit of everything, and some have little to envy from the big supermarkets. This is a cooperative where each runs their own shop, competing and cooperating at the same time, with an emphasis on personal customer relationships. “You know why,” was the slogan of a former DIKO politician.
What they seem unable to do is adapt to the demands of the times, resulting in empty shelves. Some appear so outdated that you find yourself checking whether the sign outside reads “colonial goods”. The mindset of their leadership is also problematic, resembling old-school shopkeepers who do not allow customers to touch the products but insist you tell them what you want so they can fetch it for you. Were it not for the retro charm, some past savings and the family nature of the business, some of these shops would have closed long ago, if they do not do so in 2026.
The Anti-System Players
Polls show ELAM, ALMA, and Fidias Panayiotou’s Direct Democracy entering Parliament with momentum. Their anti-system character lies in their breaking of the traditional model that sees political parties as supermarkets, though each does so in a different way.
ELAM breaks the rule by focusing heavily on migration and so-called national issues, prompting questions as to whether it has positions on anything else. As a shop, it resembles old butcheries that have evolved into boutique meat stores, swearing that the lamb is of Greek origin. At the same time, they import ideas and rhetoric from the wild plains of the American West, and if you are a committed “meat-eater”, it is hard to resist the MAGA fillets.
ELAM’s problem is that similar products can be found in DISY’s supermarket or the Centre’s cooperative, often at better prices. There are also question marks over whether its hidden corner in the Presidential mall and the global MAGA trend will sustain its momentum until the end.
ALMA, led by Odysseas Michaelides, is also currently single-issue, as personal confrontations and corruption-related matters overshadow all other positions, making the shop look poorly stocked. For now, it benefits from the undeniably impressive opening event, Michaelides’ conviction, as well as its intention to enter the Presidential mall in 2028 as a potential ally of AKEL. If it does not soon begin filling its shelves, its momentum will start to fade.
Unlike ELAM and ALMA, the anti-system nature of Fidias Panayiotou and Direct Democracy does not lie in being single-issue, but in their approach. As a business, it resembles modern-day travelling traders, fruit sellers and cheesemakers who tour Cyprus in their vans, having first announced on social media that they will be in your area.
This model is based on personal contact and relationships, as well as consistency and frequency of visits and posts. Every Monday in Paphos and every Saturday in Aglantzia, rain or shine. If you do not see him, you may start to worry. You are not so much waiting for the products as for the entertainment provided by the trader, who might even crack a dirty joke about cucumbers or melons. So what if some of the produce looks rotten or you know you might be overpaying? Who can really hold a grudge against the cheeky street vendor, except for the neighbouring supermarket or grocery store that watches him set up his cart in its own car park and cause scenes with the security guard?
Organic Products
Volt and the Greens appear to be modelled on shops offering organic products. They are a relatively new category, where you can find everything, but you know they are not aimed at everyone. Slightly or significantly more expensive than conventional goods, but free (or at least meant to be) from toxic substances.
They clearly do not target the masses, and their biggest problem is not competition between themselves, but the fact that both small and large supermarkets have created their own organic sections. In May, we will find out whether there truly is space for them in politics, or whether they should have sought their own corner inside a larger supermarket.